The final post
This post was supposed to be up on Wednesday, but I contemplated about posting it. I busied myself with work and writing about work related stuff but it just keeps getting back to me.
On Wednesday, I got two rude shocks.
The first one. (The milder of the two)
I know YOU read my blog.
Abstracted from HER blog dated 08/03/2006
Did she mean me? According to her, she is fine with it.
If it is fine with her, it is fine with me.
The second one. (More impact)
I've learnt that she too knows about my blog.
It was totally unexpected, and I could do nothing to stop HER from knowing my blog address.
All because someone decided to let the cat out of the bag!
Cowboy Caleb once wrote,
Blogging is mental masturbation. You can either do it in the privacy of your room (albeit: pen and paper) or you can be kinky and wank off in public, where the thrill of other bloggers discovering your nasty habit is high.
Admit it, you want to be caught. It gives you a sense of exhiliration. You blog because you want the rest of the world to share the experience with you, otherwise you might as well just kill a few trees and start a diary instead.
But when you get caught, you cry bloody murder. Nobody forced you to post those pics. Nobody put a gun to your head and told you to write those words. You did it - all by yourself. You wanted to.
You practically sign away all your rights to privacy when you blog.
All of a sudden, I feel very exposed.
I can't hide under my nickname anymore, despite my many attempts to cover up the man behind my online moniker.
Now that my blog is discovered by HER, I don't think I will be able to express my thoughts as freely as I used to anymore.
Everytime I want to blog about HER, I can't.
Especially when I know that she will be reading about what I write.
I suddenly have no more urge to blog, even though I had a few drafts in my mind already.
This may very well be my very final post.
I may start a new blog, I may not.
Even if I do start anew, I would not be posting as The Lecherous Monk any longer.
I like you all to know that it has been a fun and interesting journey for me. The interesting photoshopped photos, my "being SDU" project", my opinions on events that happen in and outside school etc etc.
Its sad but I feel that I have to let go of my identity which I have painstakingly nurtured and maintained over my past 24 years.
To all my friends who reads my blog, I've never regretted letting you know about my blog address despite the risk involved. I guess secrets can't be kept forever. There will always be a risk of exposure despite my many attempts to hide things. But I still want to thank you people for supporting me and my blog over this past year.
To all the total strangers who bookmarks my blog/reads my blog/have commented, people like Janice, Skybellz, Gabrielle, SB, Kawa, and the many unknowns. You know who you are. I'm honoured to have my blog being patronised by you people.
All you readers just gave me a motivation to just keep blogging, and blogging and blogging. Don't worry, I'll still pop over to your blogs whenever I have the time.
Thank you again.
Toodles.
On Wednesday, I got two rude shocks.
The first one. (The milder of the two)
I know YOU read my blog.
Abstracted from HER blog dated 08/03/2006
Did she mean me? According to her, she is fine with it.
If it is fine with her, it is fine with me.
The second one. (More impact)
I've learnt that she too knows about my blog.
It was totally unexpected, and I could do nothing to stop HER from knowing my blog address.
All because someone decided to let the cat out of the bag!
Cowboy Caleb once wrote,
Blogging is mental masturbation. You can either do it in the privacy of your room (albeit: pen and paper) or you can be kinky and wank off in public, where the thrill of other bloggers discovering your nasty habit is high.
Admit it, you want to be caught. It gives you a sense of exhiliration. You blog because you want the rest of the world to share the experience with you, otherwise you might as well just kill a few trees and start a diary instead.
But when you get caught, you cry bloody murder. Nobody forced you to post those pics. Nobody put a gun to your head and told you to write those words. You did it - all by yourself. You wanted to.
You practically sign away all your rights to privacy when you blog.
All of a sudden, I feel very exposed.
I can't hide under my nickname anymore, despite my many attempts to cover up the man behind my online moniker.
Now that my blog is discovered by HER, I don't think I will be able to express my thoughts as freely as I used to anymore.
Everytime I want to blog about HER, I can't.
Especially when I know that she will be reading about what I write.
I suddenly have no more urge to blog, even though I had a few drafts in my mind already.
This may very well be my very final post.
I may start a new blog, I may not.
Even if I do start anew, I would not be posting as The Lecherous Monk any longer.
I like you all to know that it has been a fun and interesting journey for me. The interesting photoshopped photos, my "being SDU" project", my opinions on events that happen in and outside school etc etc.
Its sad but I feel that I have to let go of my identity which I have painstakingly nurtured and maintained over my past 24 years.
To all my friends who reads my blog, I've never regretted letting you know about my blog address despite the risk involved. I guess secrets can't be kept forever. There will always be a risk of exposure despite my many attempts to hide things. But I still want to thank you people for supporting me and my blog over this past year.
To all the total strangers who bookmarks my blog/reads my blog/have commented, people like Janice, Skybellz, Gabrielle, SB, Kawa, and the many unknowns. You know who you are. I'm honoured to have my blog being patronised by you people.
All you readers just gave me a motivation to just keep blogging, and blogging and blogging. Don't worry, I'll still pop over to your blogs whenever I have the time.
Thank you again.
Toodles.
12 Comments:
BOOHOO you're not going to write here anymore?
What the big deal about it.If i will you i continue writing regardless of who visit it.It shows you are not afraid to voice out your thoughts and maybe in another way..it show your feeling for someone you like.
Anyway,whatever it is you decide.u have my continuous support.
What the hell, so disappointing. Whatever man.
hey...can u email me your new blog add if you do hv one? I read them..and i wont link them, i promise! :) sigh, maybe, it may not be a bad thing tt she knows...it might be for the better? cheer up okie? :)
it's only a girl.. pls contd to write ok!!
- starrfish
oh man.. who is the one who told her? oh my...
Damn. :(
Dude, just do what I do. I usually blog about things that I don't want people to know or people who reads my blog, work... I just blog them vaguely.
Yeah, not very satisfying, but at least it gets it out of your system.
kawa
Lecho, if you meant wat u said, den u disappointed me. You can certainly go beyond than that. It's nothing wrong writing about anything else and about her. SO what she knows, if she knows yet she wanna read it, that's her stuff. And you do your stuff.
And you know you do have a following. Dun just give up just because You tink you can't do it.
.LuKe.
HEYYYYY....why close ur blog?????
you'll be putting ALL the other readers to a total disappointment leh!!
maybe you can try poetry or metaphorical expressions next time lar...
i cant help but agree with the rest monkie!!! don't stop!!! boohoohoo!!!
Hey... I'm just some passerby. (:
Maybe you can change your blog address and change your nickname? That'd be sooo much more convenient than shutting down a blog and starting a new one.
Just a suggestion. ;D
Juliana: Too late for that. My new blog is already generating visitors.
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